


Assassin Teachers

by fandom_susceptible



Category: Avengers Academy (Comics), Avengers Assemble (Cartoon), DCU, Next Avengers, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Young Justice (Cartoon)
Genre: Avengers Academy - Freeform, Because let's face it they both have filthy mouths, But only from Bucky and Logan, He didn't either, I don't read them, In my defense I research the comics, Inspired By Tumblr, JLA and Avengers are middle-aged, Marvel/DC fusion verse, Profanity, Teacher Bucky Barnes, Teacher Logan, The format is hard for me, Their kids are in high school, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, Which is Avengers Academy, You Have Been Warned, Young Justice - Freeform, he didn't sign up for this, steve rogers is amused
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-28
Updated: 2017-05-28
Packaged: 2018-11-05 21:31:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 721
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11021988
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fandom_susceptible/pseuds/fandom_susceptible
Summary: When Black Widow and Batman both turn down the job of gym teacher (and she takes her place as rightful leader of the spying class), Steve is drafted to find someone else.  He can't take the job, he teaches English class!  So who does he turn to but his two oldest friends?Bucky and Logan are not happy.





	Assassin Teachers

**Author's Note:**

> Read the tags. After that, know that in my verse Laura is actually Mockingbird | Bobbi Morse in my head, Cooper is Francis, Lila and Nate exist, but they also adopted the twins (despite their vast age difference from the other kids). Wally lives with Barry and Iris. Robin is Dick Grayson.
> 
> Logan's been friends with Bucky and Steve since 1942. I'll be putting up some backstory on that eventually.

     "Fuck this shit, I was brainwashed, I don't deserve this." Bucky muttered, glaring at the class of students he was supposed to be teaching gym. "Alex.  Alessandra Stark, don't you think I can't see you, put that grenade back right now.  Francis Barton I swear if you touch that I will murder you and convince your father he hallucinated you out of Pietro, don't think I won't and J _ames Sean Rogers you stop running right this minute before you have an asthma attack_.  Torunn leave Azari alone!  For God's sake you are all teenagers you're not little kids anymore would you fucking grow up!?"

     "Language." James scolded as soon as he caught his breath.

     Bucky would have facepalmed, but he didn't dare take his eyes off the class.  He hadn't blinked in half an hour.  Francis' fingers were a little too quick on his bowstring for that. "You can chide me on language if you're still alive at thirty, okay kid?  But if you die, wait till _after_ class, I don't need Steve on my ass about it." His eyes widened. "Pietro, Wally, I see you whispering back there, don't you try and zip out, I will tell Bobbi and Iris.  Kaldur, why are you guys here again?"

     "Black Canary has been unable to make several training sessions, so the League thought it would be educational to experience Avengers Academy for a time." Aqualad replied.

     "Thank you, only respectful child in the entire class." Bucky said dryly. _And he had to be part fish._ He added mentally, seeing the teen's gills flex. "Robin, get down from there!  This is not the fucking circus!"

 

* * *

 

 

     "Why!" Bucky groaned, slamming his forehead on the coffee table in the Avengers common room. "Steve, why.  Why do I have to do this!" He heard snickers and jerked up to glare. "Steven.  Ste _ven Grant Rogers don't you laugh at me.  Who thought this was a good idea!?_ "

     Steve laughed in his face. "You did, Buck.  When Nat resigned you volunteered."

     "I take it back!"

     "No takebacks." Steve smirked over the rim of his mug of tea. "They're yours now."

     "That doesn't make any sense!"

     "Why, would you rather us give them to Stark for gym class?" Steve smirked again.

     "I - what?  No, that's not what I'm saying." Bucky looked horrified at the mere prospect. "But dear lord why me?"

     Steve just laughed again.

     "I am not a suitable role model for children, Steven!" Bucky snapped, annoyed.

     "You were my role model." Steve said, still smiling.

     Bucky glowered. " _Exactly!  Look how **you** turned out!  Oh look, a plane, let's crash it into the fucking Arctic because I'm a fucking drama queen who can't transmit his fucking coordinates_!"

     "Language!  And that was _one time_ , Buck, _one time_ , let it go."

     "That _one time_ of yours lasted seventy fuckin' years, Rogers." Logan finally spoke up, growling with his feet up on the coffee table. "And what the hell were you thinking anyway?  You know how to fly a damn plane, you know proper crash procedure.  I taught you!"

     Steve glowered. "Yeah well, you were a horrific teacher, I learned more from Howard."

     "Howard _Stark_?" Heavy boots clunked down on the floor as the mutant levelled a furious glare at him.

     "Guys can we focus?  I can't do this!  Robin was on the ceiling Steve!  The _ceiling_!  I don't even know how he got up there!  And Alex kept picking up bombs, and Superboy is freakishly dense, you know that?  I mean physically, he weighs way too much for his size and build, have I mentioned I hate sparring with Kryptonians because I do!  Francis was shooting people and Torunn was acting like everyone but Azari was below her and honestly Kaldur and Azari are the only relatively well-behaved children in the entire class!  Even James is a little shit!"

     Steve glared at both of them. "And you think you could do better!?"

     "Yes!" Both men snapped.

     Steve suddenly smirked at them. "Good.  I'll see you at the school tomorrow." He put his mug in the sink of the adjoining kitchenette and walked out.

     Bucky and Logan stared after him for a moment before exchanging glances. "Did he just . . ." Bucky started.

     "He did." Logan confirmed.

     "I'm gonna kill him."

     "Let me torture him first."

     "Good idea." . . . . "After class."

     ". . . . fine."

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> If there's any demand I might continue writing in this verse. I've always headcanoned it, I've just always had trouble finding scenarios to write in it (when I actually have time to write them).


End file.
